Moving Forward

    I have this theory-a working theory, really-that maybe life isn't always as bad as it seems. And maybe there really are better days ahead. Maybe all those sappy sentiments our parents told us as we were growing up to make us feel better held some truth. What was it that C.S. Lewis once said? "There are far, far better things ahead than any we leave behind." Yeah, I think that basically sums up what I'm trying to say here. And this may all just seem like my regular random thoughts that I throw out on occasion, and maybe it is, but I honestly feel like it's incredibly important that we all understand that everything really is going to be okay, no matter what you find yourself going through. I've seen so much sadness and heartbreak lately, and experienced a lot of it myself, and throughout it all I've wondered how it was fair that these things were happening to the people around me, or even to myself. And it took awhile for me to realize that all of these hardships were not to be seen as objects that were just in our way and had to be pushed to the side, but they were struggles that needed to be faced. They were placed in our lives because we needed to fight through them, overcome them, and ultimately learn from them. Any person who says life is easy might just possibly be the most ignorant person on the planet. But anyone who says life is beautiful is absolutely right. And through everything I've experienced lately, I've come to understand a few things, which I of course am obliged to share with you. So, in the spirit of organized thought, I've made a list, one that will hopefully shed some light on just how to overcome whatever problems you might be facing, and move on to bigger and better things.

1. Yes, people are going to hurt you, and yes, it's going to suck. Like a lot.
    And here's what's going to suck even more-you're going to hurt others at some point as well. We've all been in both places, and it can be incredibly difficult to pull ourselves out of the funk we sometimes slip into. But here's the important thing to keep in mind-we're all human, and we all make mistakes.
    This is so key to remember because it's ultimately the key to forgiving not only others, but ourselves. We're all so quick to be defensive when others say or do something hurtful to us, but what if, instead of being so quick to lash out, or say a bad word against someone, we just let it go? It might seem like a crazy idea, but it truly is the key to not getting stuck in the past. Forgiveness is not just an ideal for the religious, it's a practice we should all adopt, if not for any other reason than we would all want someone to forgive us for any wrong we may have done. We will never know the entirety of what others have been through, or what they are going through, and others will never know the same for us. We need to learn to practice more empathy, and act first with kindness rather than anger. Whether it be in a broken friendship, broken relationship, or even just a small injustice done by an acquaintance, it would serve us all better to work through the pain with more understanding rather than working through it by causing the offender more pain. I'll be the first to admit that I'm certainly guilty of becoming angered after I've been hurt by someone, and I've recently decided to change that. And I urge everyone else to do the same. It's time we put a little bit more love and understanding in the world.

2. It's okay to cry, and it certainly doesn't make you weak.
    I've struggled with this a lot. That is, thinking that crying was a sign of weakness, and therefore hated anytime I cried in front of others. And having that state of mind really sucked for me, because I tend to cry...a lot. But I've realized that all this time that I've been so worried about coming off as weak when I cry, I haven't stopped to think about the fact that I haven't become any weaker as a result of my emotions. In fact, a good crying session tends to make me feel better, and clears my head. This is something I want you all to understand. Crying is under no circumstances a sign of weakness, rather it's a sign that you acknowledge the pain you're feeling, and may even be the first step towards a resolution to your problems. Understanding your feelings and emotions is a highly underrated skill, and that's partly due to the fact that so many people see it as being something weak people or even just women take part in. Okay...so not true. Feeling is not a gender specific activity, you guys. We all feel, and we're all sad sometimes, so why are we so afraid of showing it, but so quick to show others when we're happy? Once we learn that it's okay to feel all kinds of emotions, we'll find it much easier to work through our problems.

3. There's always an opportunity to find your way back if you ever become lost.
    I feel like I should clarify this, and I'm certainly up for the challenge. We all know that we've been gifted with certain abilities and talents that are unique to us, and it's in my full belief that these gifts are not only meant to be spread out into the world, but are also given to us so that we may always have a way of finding our way back to who we really are, no matter how far we might wander off. For example, whenever I seem to be in an exceptionally difficult place in my life, I turn to writing to make sense of it all (kind of like what I'm doing right now), and it never fails to simplify everything and remind of what I care most about in life. Basically, it puts things in perspective for me. And this is something that pertains to us all. We all have something, that one thing we find solace in when times get tough, that gives us the confidence and strength we need to keep going. So whether you're a grand poet, or enjoy star-gazing, or can master any arpeggio, use your talents to not only bring joy and peace to others, but to yourself as well. We all tend to get caught up in so many intricate, unimportant problems in life, and it's a good idea to bring yourself back to what brings you true happiness every once in awhile.

4. Learn to admit and accept when you're wrong.
    Yeah, I know this one can be difficult, and lately I've had a very hard time grasping this concept, but I'm slowly becoming more open to it. It kind of goes hand-in-hand with forgiving yourself, but the key is that you must acknowledge that you've done something wrong or hurtful before you can forgive yourself. Part of growing up is understanding that we sometimes cause our own problems, not others. Or we at the very least play some sort of role in our problems. Whatever the case, we should all learn to accept that we mess up sometimes, and then take whatever actions necessary to make up for it. And yes, this includes apologizing. I know...eww. But seriously, guys, it's so important. We can't just push responsibility away forever, we need to embrace the idea of maturing and understanding both our strengths and our weaknesses.

5. No matter what life throws at you, never forget to love and give thanks as much as you can.
    Even if you're going through such a tough time that all you have to be thankful for is another day of living, be thankful for that. It's something denied to many people every day, and each new sunrise opens up endless opportunities and chances to turn things around. It's always been my opinion that love is the greatest power on Earth, and is an endless resource that we all treat as scarce. Nothing is guaranteed in life, so take time to love those who build you up and push you to be a better person, and while you're at it, love those who don't do those things for you as well. Love people for the mere fact that we're all amazing, unique individuals with the endless capacity to love and be loved. Be thankful for everything good in life, and during the tough times, hold tight to those good things and focus only on them. But also be thankful for the difficult times, for they help shape us just as much as the good times. Be thankful for the people who help and hurt you, and try loving both equally. Be happy with the little things in life, and understand the importance of the big things. Take time out of your day to just pause for a moment and admire something beautiful. Dare I say, stop and smell the roses.

    So that's it for my grand list of inspiration, at least for now. And something important to remember is that these are practices that take time to incorporate into our life, but a great way to start is to just keep an open mind, and remember that we are constantly learning new things, I myself learned a lot just by writing this all out. But really all I'm trying to get across with all of this is that whatever problems you're facing right now should pale in comparison to the beauty that is out in the world. That yes, you may be hurting tonight, but that doesn't mean that something won't come along tomorrow that turns your world around and changes everything. And if it doesn't, just wait, because something is bound to change. I will always stand by my theory that no matter what, everything's going to be okay.

    And you know what? Not even okay. Everything's going to be awesome.

Be the Change

       Alright you guys, there's something big going on, and I'm not talking about the UK premiere of Downton Abbey (even though that means we only have to endure 4 more months of Downton withdrawals before the new season starts here).

       I'm sure most of you have watched or at least heard about the speech on gender equality that the UN Women Goodwill Ambassador Emma Watson gave just a couple of days ago, seeing as it was shared by numerous social media users (myself included), and was highly publicized and covered by different news sites. This speech was part of a special event held to start the HeForShe campaign, a campaign designed to promote gender equality and the empowerment of women. The goal of this project is to create a better world for both women and men, where everyone can be free to live as they please, without any gender stereotypes to hold them back. And this all starts not only with women feeling empowered enough to stand up for their individuality, but it starts with men all around the world, taking a stand against the discrimination and mistreatment of women and girls. The problem with the gender barriers we see today lies in the perpetual ideals that are assigned to males and females. Whereas the term "male" carries around words like "tough", "emotionless", and "macho" with it, the term "female" tends to become synonymous with words such as "fragile", "irrational", and "incapable". HeForShe aims to break down these labels by urging men all over to tear away at them and finally start to live the way they truly want to, disregarding any and all thoughts that may try and tell them something they are doing isn't considered "masculine", while also halting the use of those words in relation to anything dealing with gender. The hope is for a totally neutral, totally equal view of both men and women to arise that will encourage the abilities and opportunities of all.

       There are many reasons why this campaign is so revolutionary and unbelievably necessary, one being that the world we live in today has been shaped into a society that looks primarily to men for leadership and guidance. But this is exactly why it's focus is on men everywhere to start the change that will in turn give women the freedom to live as equals. Once men feel it's okay to drop the masculine act, women will then be able to drop the feminine counterpart. Once women decide that they are worth enough, men will start to see them that way. As Emma Watson put it in her speech, "If men don't have to be aggressive in order to be accepted, women won't feel compelled to be submissive. If men don't have to control, women won't have to be controlled." This project involves us all. It's requiring us to take a sincere look at ourselves and the world around us, and take charge in solving the problems that need to be solved.

    I consider myself a feminist because I believe that there are things happening in every country around this world to women that are simply unacceptable. I consider myself a feminist because I choose to stand up for the fact that I, along with every single other person on this planet, have come from the same place and are going to end up in the same place, and are therefore complete equals, regardless of gender, race, beliefs, or any other possible factor. I don't consider myself a feminist because I believe women are better than men, I consider myself a feminist because I believe women can be just as good as men. We should all feel free to break down the gender barriers that have surrounded and trapped us for so long, and actually live the way we want to without fear of social rejection. 

    And I suppose that's why I decided to post this today. Because in the midst of the seemingly endless list of things I have to do, it occurred to me that there were changes to be made in the world, and I wanted to start doing my part, as well as urging others to do theirs. A lot of you may not see the point in rambling on about something like this, but I've always believed in taking a stand for what I believe in, and there are few things that I have ever believed in more than this. Don't allow your doubts and fears to hold you back any longer, because I know, just as you all do, that there's something in us that can make change happen. You can make a difference, you can be a part of a movement that has the potential to change the course of history, if we're all willing to stand up for it. Don't let the world continue down this path of immorality and inequality, become an active participant in something that the people of the future are going to read about in their history books. 

       You can visit www.heforshe.org and click "Accept" to start taking action. The website also offers ways in which we can all do our part, including a special sign-up for the men who want to join the cause. I'll post a link to the website below, as well as a link to the UN Women site. We all have the ability to change the world around us, and it's about darn time we took advantage of that. As the wonderful Ms. Watson put it, "If not me, who? If not now....when?". 

HeForShe website:

http://www.heforshe.org/

UN Women website:

http://www.unwomen.org/en

Living Free (and most importantly, happy)

      So I actually have a real reason for posting today I promise, but I do want to take a little time to explain a few new additions to the blog first, mainly because I'm so incredibly excited that it's all sort of coming along now. Like you guys don't even understand, I was so pumped up when I started thinking of new ideas that I actually spilled an entire glass of water on my bed. I had to sleep on the opposite side that night. But anyway, these are just a couple of changes out of the many that are still to come. I have so many different ideas that have yet to be fully developed, but once they are, you can certainly expect to see them on here. Here are some of the new additions:

           1. I have started a seasonal reading list, which will include a handful of books that may or may not be applicable to the time of year, but either way are great reads. You can find these books under the "Fall Reading List!" tab (I thought if i added the exclamation point it would sound more exciting since, as I understand it, not everyone accepts reading as the pleasant pastime that I view it as-I'd like to think it served its purpose). And, as the term "seasonal" suggests, I will be updating this list at the beginning of every fall, winter, spring, and summer. I've attempted to choose books that I think even the person fostering the deepest, most hated feelings toward literature will grow to appreciate.

           2. Every time I make a new post I will feature a different musical artist or band that has caught my attention. Music plays such an important role in not only my life, but the lives of many others, and I think there is a plethora of artists out there that deserve to be spotlighted. The chosen artist for the post will be displayed on the right side of the blog, along with some of their videos from YouTube that you can watch/listen to from the blog page, or open in a new window. I would also love to hear from you guys if you have any artists you want the world to know about! While the artist will change every time I write something new, I am going to keep a record of all the past ones I post under the "Featured Artists" tab. I will also include some information about the musician or group, a list of some of their key songs (in my opinion, of course), and the blog post date it was featured in. There are currently two artists there now- Ben Rector, and this post's artist, Kodaline. So check it out!


      Alright, now down to business. I'm always searching the web for unique articles or websites that catch my eye and seem to offer some different type of story, and this week I didn't have to look very far to find something. Yahoo! recently posted a story on it's homepage about a woman who left her job to travel the world-something that seems pretty insane to do. But, as the woman explains in the article, her travels taught her invaluable life lessons-9 to be in fact-and it taught me to make my dream of seeing the world more of a reality.
      The author of the article and the woman who experienced it all, Paula Froelich, uses a slideshow of pictures from her visits to various regions to illustrate the changes she went through. The slideshow includes wonderful pictures like this:

And this:

      And other great ones as well. But the real wonder in this article lies in the content. Froelich discusses learning such lessons as "Silence and stillness are your friends", "What matters is what I think of me..", and "Anger, verbal outbursts, war, and violence should be avoided at all costs". She explains how, by learning these values, leaving her job and traveling the world turned out to be the best decision she ever made.
      I can't tell you how much this inspired me, and not only because I've always had an interest in visiting as many places in the world as I can. This article, this amazing person, proved to the world that sometimes doing what makes you happy is so incredibly more important than whatever status you hold in society. And it definitely did inspire me to work harder on saving up and planning for future travel plans. Most people, myself included, feel like some of their dreams and goals are just too far out of reach, because the rest of the world seems to think those goals aren't the right thing to go after. But honestly, all that is going to matter at the end of your life is how happy you were. And by happy I don't mean content, I mean genuinely, undeniably happy with basically everything about your life, from accepting and being happy with yourself, to being happy with your surroundings and the people in them. Stop making excuses on why things won't work out, stop overthinking everything, and for heavens' sake, PLEASE stop worrying so dang much about what other people think. You become someone so much more beautiful and inspiring and amazing when you choose to take control of your life and live it the way you want to.
     So, if anyone out there who chooses to read Paula Froelich's article (which you totally should because of obvious reasons) takes just one thing away from it all, let it be this: that no matter where you find yourself in life, take the time to stop and really think about whether you're happy or not. And if you find yourself answering no, don't be afraid to do everything humanly possible to change that. Peace, love, and Nutella to all.


You can read the full article here:

9 Life Lessons I Learned by Ditching My Career and Traveling the World

In With the New

       There are honestly so many ways I could start out my first post on here, and believe me, I went through about a hundred of them. But I feel the need to just say that whatever I choose to write, this blog marks the start of something new for me, and I hope it helps others at some point during it's existence. We all tend to reach those times in our lives when things don't really seem to work anymore, or maybe they just never did and now you're basically done with everything and spending all your free time emotional-eating your way through a pint of Ben and Jerry's. The point is, I've definitely been going through what some might call a "slump" lately-going back to school has been tough for me, seeing as I took a year off after I graduated, and the struggle to balance school, work, and all the other responsibilities that come with being an adult have really gotten to me. I was becoming too disconnected with all the things that had enriched my life previously like friends, family, and even just some regular downtime. I was forgetting that while I was so focused on school and working on my future, that my present was also important. I shouldn't have to sacrifice my happiness now to experience it later, as should no one else.
        So, the product of that "revelation" of sorts is this very blog. Most people who know me know that I have a love of writing, a love that's been a part of me for as long as I can remember. And I can't imagine ever doing or wanting to do anything else with my life (insert intense emotional pause here). But as cheesy as it sounds, it's the complete truth, and I am even planning on majoring in Journalism. By creating this blog, I've created a way for me to get back into the writing world and gain an opportunity to become more connected with what's taking place around me, as well as trying to impact others.
       But now just a little bit on the purpose of it all. I think the name would be a good place to start. My favorite artist of all time in the history of God's wonderful world is Ben Rector. He's not necessarily well-known, but his music just always seems to get to me. Honestly guys, check this dude's music out-he's amazing. Anyway, his newest album is titled "The Walking in Between", which features a song called "I Like You". It is in this song that you hear the lyrics: "Because life is not the mountaintops-it's the walking in between...". Classic Ben, pullin' at my heartstrings, making me really reflect on life and what it all means. These lyrics are trying to express the point of view that life isn't necessarily about the huge milestones we experience, but the smaller moments that slowly but surely transform us into who we each are today. That there is something good, some beautiful moment (or moments even) to be found in every day. They don't have to be big moments to mean something. I suppose that's really why I'm here creating this blog, to share all the things I find myself running into that change my perspective on life, even if it's just in the slightest way. Because really, most of us don't have crazy and exciting lives filled with "mountaintops", most of us are working our way through the in between, but the in between can be pretty great sometimes. Like I said before, my goal is to not only share my stories, but relate them in a way that will hopefully impact others and help them understand just how great this world can be, if you're willing to look hard enough and let go of some of the seemingly big issues. Because really, how rewarding is reaching the destination without being able to look back and remember a totally awesome journey.




I'll just leave this here...
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=zD7_I3mb1ng


Also, this: The definitive proof that Ben Rector and I are made for one another-we both enjoy cups used to enjoy warm beverages (this was totally not staged)